A Gradual Dawning

Eventually all the games
The twists and turns, the avoidance
And the mental manipulation,
All the feeble and emboldened attempts by the mind
To figure it all out and keep me safe
Came to an end, worn out by over use
And a lack of attention on my part
I just figured, let the tapes run
I’m not going to listen
And they got quieter and quieter
Until one day I noticed silence
And stillness
No more monkey on my back
And no more noise.

Since then there have been no more stories
And no more argument with what is
Just this sweet simplicity
And a voice that speaks
Of love
And little else.

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love shows up in disguise

and when i forget
or fall upon my own sword
and slip into grievance
or self righteousness
love shows up
usually in disguise
but always with
the same invitation
to surrender it all
into the unknown

this is my life now
constant falling

i dont mind what happens

i gave up wanting anything to be any different
than the way it is
and rather than causing me to sink into
powerlessness and depression
it actually liberated me
into great freedom and compassion…

there is one line that,
if you digest it deeply enough,
will liberate you.

krishnamurti said, “i don’t mind what happens.’

when i heard that it blew my mind and changed my life

it still does.

for one moment, just stop

for one brief moment
see if it is possible
to stop, without force,
all concern with your seeking activity
just see if you can
let it all just be there
without touching it
or reacting to it
allow everything
to be just the way it is
without wanting it to be any different

if you can do such a thing
even for the briefest moment
you will have touched silence
your true home
and if you can endeavor to move and act
and live
from this silence
it will change everything
within and without
for the rest of your life.

swimming in a vast ocean

i looked for something to cling to
and realized i was swimming in a vast eternal ocean
of consciousness
i saw huge forms rising
planets exploding, stars dancing across the sky
mountains, trees and ants
all doing the same thing
and in that vision i saw myself
sometimes terrified
and sometimes bewitched
by the staggering beauty
of it all
and in that seeing i stopped
looking for something to cling to
or some way of understanding anything
and i fell back and rested
in the arms of the one intelligence
that animates all things
what astonishing peace came upon me
and what great joy.

An Exquisite Silent Majesty

In moments of the deepest contemplation
Of unfixed awareness
When the gaze is turned inwards
But not on any object
It is as though
I have entered a Cathedral
Of the greatest majesty
An exquisite silence pervades all things
And the very air pulses with presence
It is as though there were something vibrantly alive
In everything
And the quieter I become
The more alive it is

And I realize it is always here
And it is me who comes and goes

My true devotion is to that
Exquisite silence.

The Illusion of Opposites – A Story

As it arrived at the gathering
Death appeared to mock Life, taunting it
With an arrogance, a leering smile and a brash dismissal,

Shrouded in black, faceless and anonymous.
“We are locked in eternal embrace,” grinned death,
“And I always win. I take them all, I take everything eventually.”
“Ah,’ said Life, Sweet Death, always thinking in opposites.”
“What is it you win, exactly?”

You do not understand, obsessed as you are by transitions and crossings. You see a part of the picture and think it is the whole picture. I see the whole picture and embrace everything inside it. The coming and going, the movement towards and the movement away, the struggle and the ease, the peaceful acceptance and the angry struggle, and the longing for immortality. Nothing is separate from the whole. There is only one thing, sweet death, and you, and I , and everything that ever has been and ever will be, is it. You may imagine me as your enemy, but I love your delusion as a mother loves her unruly baby.”

They left the gathering together.

Everything is Connected

All things that exist
Are connected to each other
In ways we cannot see or know

And subtle waves
That run through existence
Carry messages from everything
To everything else

If you pull on one piece
Of this mesmeric tapestry
The effect nearby will be great
And further away
It will become less and less obvious

And equally, we imagine ourselves separate
From each other
But we are connected in the same way
Each of us affecting the rest
Like an enormous family

If only we could understand this one thing
We may be able to restore some sanity
To humanity

Alas, I fear the worst,
That this simple understanding
Is out of reach
For most
And we must blunder on in our self deception
And suffering.

throw away the coat of falseness

there is something that animates us
some mysterious force
that drives us all
yet we pay it scant regard
as we rush here and there
in our importance
we are like skaters on ice
oblivious to the darkness
that lies below our feet

but without touching your essence
without knowing, and i mean directly through experience,
what lies deeper down
there can be no true wisdom
wisdom is depth articulated
and depth is where essence is touched

i played the game of the superficial ones
for a time
but i failed
i nearly suffocated
and died of tedium
for time wasted
on triviality

instead i walked into the air
stepped into the fire
tore myself to pieces
drowned in the ocean
left everything behind
wept, screamed, danced wildly
kept silent for days
and threw away the coat of falseness

and arrived at essence
now there is only this walking essence-ness

friend, you are here such a short time
never here again in this body, with this mind
don’t waste it on things that don’t serve your
beautiful radiance

turn towards the sun
and surrender to the force..

journey of journeys

you must go to the mountain top
or the cave
alone – if you seek to awaken –
without any friends or loved ones
when you return everyone will be your friend
and no one will be
as you leave for
your journey of journeys
take a look around
and you will not see the beloved anywhere
yet upon your return
the beloved is all you will see

god, love, truth, the beloved,
whatever you want to call the divine,
is always here
but we pretend to hide
like naughty children
hiding in the closet
from mum and dad

who are we kidding?